On Fiya!

I started to write a quick update on my Facebook status, but quickly realized this is more than just a passing thought or word.  

Church was on point today. It all ties into my devotional and this path that I am being lead down. Some many things are lining up for something major, I can feel it stiring. It's the American way to want to be left alone or "not bothered". So many other cultures believe, "the more the merrier." I always say I love having people around. I am one of 7 kids and I grew up close to my family. I love them. It was always loud, we even talked in our sleep (no rest for my amazing mother). Anyway, as I sat in church today and the Pastor started telling stories of how we Americans like to do life it really clicked...I do like to be obligation free.

We moved to Hawaii about 2 months ago and it has been hard. I am very outgoing and really do love being in the company of others, it's where I thrive. So, when we were here and Dave had to go to work and I was taking care of the boys I realized how alone I actually was. Most of us out here do not have family, but you'd be surprised how much people really keep to themselves out here. I am so thankful God placed us in the community/street he did because I DO have amazing neighbors (we've already had some block parties). Any who, this all ties into this new path I'm walking.

About 9 days ago the stomach bug hit me, Dave had to leave for the field for 13 days (side note: Thank you Sgt. Williams for the bread, bananas, and anti-diarreha meds--no shame in my poop game) and I couldn't even function. I started to feel depressed and sad. My life was sooo different, my business wasn't fulfilling, I was a bad mom because my son wanted to play and I wouldn't/couldn't let him outside. All the things that are 97% not true. Luckily, I have the best, strongest friend ever who talked to me for an hour and put things into perspective. A few days later, I started feeling better and ventured out. I was determined to make things happen in this life! We went to the library, had a park play date, went to a library preschool event, etc. I began realizing that the change had to come from me. So many of us (at least here, maybe every where) feel alone. I know I always wonder if I'm making the right choice. Am I taking action, if my action right, who is going to judge me? It is when I really started diving into this devotional called, "Jesus Calling" that I really started my faith journey. This is just an amazing way to understand and explore your faith and walk with God.

So much more has happened in between that has lead me to know that everything is happening the way it is supposed to, but my point is that we are not alone. We all have gifts God has blessed us with. The great thing is every gift is different. When you surround yourself with the people that are going to raise you up when you fall you cannot go wrong. My mission is to use my gifts. I know God made me outgoing and loud and funny to make people feel comfortable. I love that about myself. I know that for others, making friends or even saying hi to random people is the scariest thing ever....I want to use my gifts to make that person comfy (not change them). Maybe someone out there can run workout session or lead a meeting without feeling like they're going to mess up or poop their pants haha that's their gift and they can give me some confidence.

Let's do life together. Let's do the uncomfy thing and let people in. We only have this time here. We do not know how much time we actually have. I know that I don't want a day to go by where I haven't made an effort to make someone else's life better, even if for a moment.

It's the small things....

So many times I live in the past and future. I stress about the past and worry about the future.  This is no way to live.  I have missed so many things that happen in the moment.  I am trying not to do that; making a conscious decision to be in the moment of this life.

  The boys and I are finally getting into a routine.  I have been trying to do it all, but it's not possible.  Everything will get done when it needs to be done.  I started to reflect on the small things that actually mean a lot to me:

* Dave being able to come home for lunch: For the past 3 years I barely saw him because of his b-billet.  Now, I get to sleep with him most nights.  He is home almost every weekend.  He literally comes home for breakfast & lunch!

* D telling me he loves me. Today, I took the boys to park because D asked earlier in the day. I was tired of feeling stuck, but now that Dave has his Jeep, we're free!  I know that the boys are feeling the stress of the change, so I wanted them to have fun.  To pick something and have it come to fruition.  I noticed today, more throughly, that he is so amazing.  He is such a happy kid.  He yearns for love and friendship (as do all kids).  This makes my heart so happy, but also sad at the same time.  Let me expand.  He yearns for friends, which he has, but I WANT HIM TO HAVE IT OFTEN!  I want D to be able to go to preschool (half day) 3-5 days a week.  It is something that he would love. I know God will make a way, but that is why I push my Advocare so hard.  That is why I am always looking to help.  I know that I am NOT the only one that wants to feel amazing, but has BIG dreams for their family.  It will happen.  I want him to have it all, but I know that he will always appreciate it.

** Side note: this kid makes me feel like the best person in the world.  I don't think he could say "I love you" any more genuine. **

* I get to be at home with my kids:  Not everyone wants this, but a lot of people do.  I am so blessed to have a job that allows this.  I will get to explore things with my kids. I will teach them.  I will not miss out on things.  I want this for others who want it.  I will continue to push for those people, because I know how amazing it is.
* Baby breath: As stated before Benji is in this fake cry mode.  It drives me nuts, but the moment I fake cry with him he smiles.  I love that I can rock him to sleep at night.  I love that he loves this family so much.  I love that Benji and D are best friends.  I love Benji's baby breath and I never want it to go away.

* I still talk to my best friend: I might not be able to run across the street and bust in.  She might not be able to hide in the back of my seat for 15 minutes to try to scare me, but we talk.  Whether it's text, phone, or Facebook...we talk.  I know that distance is not even a thing.  I am thankful for her and her faith.

* My family is coming:  A bunch of them, coming out soon and staying for a bit.  Something about having family in the house is comforting to me.  Maybe it's because I grew up 1 of 7 kids.  I just miss them.  

* I can walk to the beach:  I don't do it, but I know that I can. Sometimes after a good run we'll stop off and splash.  This is not just a beach, it's a Hawaiian beach!

Remember (as will I), God created this life for us.  Do not live in the past, don't stress about the future....live in the here & now!

MRI and Grind Time

As you know I've been going to the spine & rehab place for my hip.  Well, next week I'm having a MRI done to make sure there isn't a tear in my labrum.  I am not stoked to have a need go into my joint, but trying to remain positive about finding a solution.   

  We're settling in, in Hawaii.  Though I feel like I have not even slowed down.  Today, both boys napped at the same time for more than an hour!  Yay for mommy quiet time.  I was almost resorting to day drinking, just kidding..sort of.  Benji has decided he wants to "fake whine".  Ugh the only kinda whine I have time for is WINE!  Get it together, son.  Ball season (Marine Corps Ball) is less than 90 days away.  I have been doing my couch25k, but I need to amp up the toning.  Monday I add in T-25.  Usually I get really bored with the programs when I have to do them alone, but I am going to log my progress here.  I want to make sure I do ALL 70 DAYS!  The two dresses I have fit, but they don't look sexy.  I will fix that!  

Started MNS C (love my advocare) and I will tell you, it's pretty amazing.  I usually use E (allll the energy), but I wanted to mix it up. Speaking of Advocare, we had our first Mixer here.  6 new people came and I am excited to get back into the groove of things.  We are so close to getting D in preschool. I cannot wait to start helping others here.  I am determined to find people who are ready to start their fitness and finance journey.  

Getting excited for family to come out here and visit.  Time to get down to scrubbing this house (with a little wine and big brother to motivate me).  Hope everyone is doing great!

Monday, be ready for the before pictures.  Shaun-T I love you, but I hate you too.  

Yummy New Dinner Idea

It's been a few days since I've written anything (obviously). I wanted to start off by sharing this amazeballs recipe I found on pinterest last night!  It's a hit in this house. Dave loved it so much he was literally eating the sauce...just sauce from the pan. If I knew this other blogger, I'd personally thank her!  Here is it:

20-minute-skillet-chicken-and-spinach-parmesan

You will not be disappointed.

Weekend was good.  With the hurricanes moving around us, the beaches are a  little choppy here.  We had a great time at Bellows AFB beach.  We found a camping spot to try out.  Now, we just need to buy a tent.

Excited to start prepping for the Marine Corps ball!  We're getting dates for everything now and it's always exciting.  Being back in an infantry unit , as a wife, you know that the training days are always leading to the deployments, but I am loving life over here.  Dave is able to come home for lunch sometimes and he is home at a decent hour pretty much every night.  The people he works with are great, so he is happy.  Loving the family time so much!

Being silly with D.  I was laughing so hard my eyes were watering.

Waiting to hear back from Head Start.  In the mean time, I am trying to expand my Advocare business to help others, but to be able to have enough money to place D in a preschool program here. He's so smart and social, it would benefit him.  Excited to start out in a new area, meeting, and helping new people.

Brings me to my next point.  I am feeling the drive to go back to school. I think I want to be a massage therapist, but for a spine & rehab clinic.  I have been attending Oahu Spine & Rehab out here and I am in love.  Today, was the first time in 8 months I got out of bed and wasn't in pain.  I almost cried because I thought it would never heal.  I think the trigger point injections & KT tape are making a HUGE DIFFERENCE.  I love the trigger point massage and the STEM too!  I feel super blessed to be able to go to this amazing facility.  Going to look into schools around here and scholarships.  Pray on it a little bit and see what happens.

Future

The time has come in my life where I putting fear to rest.  I am living in Faith.  For too long I've stressed about what if's, missing out on the small things.  Crazy thing is, 98% of the time, the crazy things I've concocted in my head do not even come to fruition.  I know this is a "natural" thing, but I do not want to live an ordinary life.  I want to make a difference.  I want my boys to see a mommy who fights for their families freedoms; freedom of debt, time, stress.  I want them to see a mommy who is able to help others feel great about themselves; to help others grow in faith and in self. I want my boys to see a mommy who holds others accountable  when their fears set in.  Who reminds others that their goals and dreams are BIGGER and MORE IMPORTANT than the fear of make believe or even reality.

  I know that this dream I have for my family is not going to come by me sitting at home and wishing it; I have to work.  I AM READY TO WORK.  I will hear a lot of no's, maybe's, or you're crazy.  There will be tough times where I will question if I am doing the right thing, but by the end of the year or even this time next year when I look back I will laugh.  I will laugh at the doubt.  I know that I have some important to offer, something life changing. I  will find people that are ready and I will help, coach, mentor, friend.  God is good!  

Splash Park

Today was my information day at the the Oahu Spine & Rehab place.  Since having Ben my right hip has been in so much pain.  I am so thankful for this place.  They do amazing work and work in 4 steps to fix your aliment (using chiropractic care, trigger point massage/injections, physical therapy, etc).  I have done trigger point massage, traction, and STEM and I am so flipping' sore, but feeling so much better.  I am in love with this place, fo sho.  They have free childcare and the ladies are great with the boys.

Since Dave works and heads out to the field I have decided that everyday I am going to do something.  Whether it's running and taking the boys to the park or maybe even a beach on base; we're doing something.  Today, after the boys took a nap I took them to the splash park.  This place is too cute and a great way to meet new mommy friends.  They had a blast.  Plan of action is to put them in their bathing suits tomorrow and as soon as we finish our run head over that way to cool off before nap.

Not much to report, but if you could keep my sister in your thoughts and prayers.  She wound up at the hospital last night.  She had 2 blood clots in her lungs, close to her heart.  The doctors removed those early this morning.  They put in a catheter to eliminate a few more in her legs and as prevention.  She is okay, but in pain.  All prayers would be awesome.

Happy Thursday, Friends. Looking forward to a new beach this weekend!  Look out for new pictures of our weekend adventures! Mahalo and Aloha.

DOGS!!

Today was a busy, but great day.  We were finally able to pick up Mika & Daisy from quarantine.  In order for your pets to live in Hawaii they have to have a slew of things done and basically have 2 rabbis vaccines and not arrive on the island until 120 after their 2nd rabies shot.  Well, we fell 19 days short.  They are home now and back to their crazy selves.  I am so thankful for the staff there.  I was afraid Mika would come back skin and bone because she is so anxious, but NO!  The guy who took care of her, loved her.  She actually let him in her kennel without even barking.  She looks so good.  Daisy, is actually a lot more sweet to Mika.  D is so happy to have his dogs home.  Ben just loves dogs, so he is pumped too!

 Running.  Today was day 2 of week 1 Couch 25K (with double jogging stroller). I haven't felt this amazing in a long time.  I have run before this and I've worked out, but I haven't felt this way in a while.  I am so much stronger than I thought.  I love that I am setting an example of health & strength for our boys.  I know that D is proud of me and that makes me happy too.  Confession time.  I have let fear grip me.  I have lived in the idea of "what if?"  What if I fail? What if I can't run the whole time?  What if I can't lose any more weight? What if I fail my family? So much negative thought, BUT NO MORE!  We are what are thoughts are.  If I continue to feed myself negative thoughts,  I will get negative results.  God wants good for me and I want good for myself and family.  So, I make it known:

I know God has big plans for me

I know I will be fit and healthy, no matter how long it takes or how many times I fall, I'll pick myself up and go again.

I know that I will help others lives change.  Whether it's health, spiritual, or finances... I will make a difference.

I will make time for my boys and explore this amazing opportunity we've been giving.

I will work hard changing others situations, so that my family's situation can change.

I will work hard to send D to preschool.

I am thankful for this time I have to write this blog.  I know not a lot of people read it and maybe some are bored by it, but I am glad it's mine.  I am glad for those who do read.  I hope you have a great Thursday!

D & Mika