Church was on point today. It all ties into my devotional and this path that I am being lead down. Some many things are lining up for something major, I can feel it stiring. It's the American way to want to be left alone or "not bothered". So many other cultures believe, "the more the merrier." I always say I love having people around. I am one of 7 kids and I grew up close to my family. I love them. It was always loud, we even talked in our sleep (no rest for my amazing mother). Anyway, as I sat in church today and the Pastor started telling stories of how we Americans like to do life it really clicked...I do like to be obligation free.
We moved to Hawaii about 2 months ago and it has been hard. I am very outgoing and really do love being in the company of others, it's where I thrive. So, when we were here and Dave had to go to work and I was taking care of the boys I realized how alone I actually was. Most of us out here do not have family, but you'd be surprised how much people really keep to themselves out here. I am so thankful God placed us in the community/street he did because I DO have amazing neighbors (we've already had some block parties). Any who, this all ties into this new path I'm walking.
About 9 days ago the stomach bug hit me, Dave had to leave for the field for 13 days (side note: Thank you Sgt. Williams for the bread, bananas, and anti-diarreha meds--no shame in my poop game) and I couldn't even function. I started to feel depressed and sad. My life was sooo different, my business wasn't fulfilling, I was a bad mom because my son wanted to play and I wouldn't/couldn't let him outside. All the things that are 97% not true. Luckily, I have the best, strongest friend ever who talked to me for an hour and put things into perspective. A few days later, I started feeling better and ventured out. I was determined to make things happen in this life! We went to the library, had a park play date, went to a library preschool event, etc. I began realizing that the change had to come from me. So many of us (at least here, maybe every where) feel alone. I know I always wonder if I'm making the right choice. Am I taking action, if my action right, who is going to judge me? It is when I really started diving into this devotional called, "Jesus Calling" that I really started my faith journey. This is just an amazing way to understand and explore your faith and walk with God.
So much more has happened in between that has lead me to know that everything is happening the way it is supposed to, but my point is that we are not alone. We all have gifts God has blessed us with. The great thing is every gift is different. When you surround yourself with the people that are going to raise you up when you fall you cannot go wrong. My mission is to use my gifts. I know God made me outgoing and loud and funny to make people feel comfortable. I love that about myself. I know that for others, making friends or even saying hi to random people is the scariest thing ever....I want to use my gifts to make that person comfy (not change them). Maybe someone out there can run workout session or lead a meeting without feeling like they're going to mess up or poop their pants haha that's their gift and they can give me some confidence.
Let's do life together. Let's do the uncomfy thing and let people in. We only have this time here. We do not know how much time we actually have. I know that I don't want a day to go by where I haven't made an effort to make someone else's life better, even if for a moment.
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